I didn't mention this to you all (perhaps because I’m kind of embarrassed) but I got into a surfing accident in Costa Rica a few months ago. I was finally getting up on some waves, and feeling great. Adventure, play, travel...everything I wanted. And then BOOM. Surfing accident. I was actually at the top of a juicy wave, and I crashed straight into another beginner (of course!). Thank Goddess she was fine. My wound was gnarly. I was out of commission for a good few days, icing my right side above the hip and limping along, playing a sad victim story about how I'm "not cut out" for certain physical activity and complaining to my hubby.
And then I read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks and dug into the “upper limit problem” – the way we sabotage ourselves when we reach a certain threshold of success, abundance, or joy. It explained everything. Right when I was expanding, my subconscious decided it was way too much, and decided to shut the whole program down. It was honestly uncanny how I positioned myself perfectly at the top of the wave to crash right into this woman on a very (I repeat, very) uncrowded break right after catching my best wave ever a few minutes prior (a humble brag helps balance this all out for me).
I grew up constantly trying to "protect my body" (e.g., scared of flying objects hitting me in the head; pretty much any physical contact or sports) and telling myself the story of female fragility, and I was beginning to experience a different, more empowering narrative. I can surf. But that old programming crept up again, and tried to override the new one. Of course, there are so many ways to interpret my surfing accident, but when I read that one of the self-sabotaging tendencies was "to get sick or hurt," I instantly knew it felt true.
Surfing can be seen as a metaphor for a new relationship or career, or leaping into sharing your gifts...there is always "the opposing force of nature," as author Steven Pressfield likes to call it, that opposes the soul from expansion. Framing it as a force of nature, as natural as gravity, takes the blame off the self, and I really like that. Wherever there is positive expansion, resistance lurks in the shadows. Being aware of the nature and inevitability of resistance helps neutralize it a bit more, but we still need to stay alert to it. Eyes open, and like I like to say on the podcast: onward.
Let’s be honest. When and how do you experience your upper limit? What sneaky form does your resistance take? As you know, I always love to hear from you. Reply or comment.